This past New Year’s Eve, I scribbled my resolution out on a piece of scrap paper:
“Love you harder and kiss you more often.”
After reflecting on the past year and looking ahead to the approaching one, it just made sense. The one thing my life truly lacked lately was a connection with my partner. A bond to the one person who is, or should be, closest to me. In the aftermath of surviving our day to day lives, a gap emerged.
When was the last time I had kissed him? How long had it been since I desired him, connected with him, or even held his hand? I could barely remember.
Our relationship needed to be revived. I needed a change. Most importantly, I wanted my plan of loving him better to be held accountable. So, as my S.O. plucked away at his sixteen-hour shift, I left my resolution on our night stand and went to bed.
That’s how I kicked off the new year! With a sweet promise to pour some love and energy into my relationship. It sounds simple, but now, the question is…
How?
Leave Love Notes
A little note of appreciation or encouragement can go a long way. Especially for couples like us that don’t see each other in person that often. As an added bonus, writing love notes doesn’t cost anything and it takes up very little time. Whether it is handed written or a sweet text, do something to let your guy know he is on your mind! You could also put together this dry erase frame. Then you can easily take turns showing some love!
Be Thoughtful
I do considerate things for my kiddo, all the time. I cut her food up the way she likes it, make sure she has her favorite pillow and blanket each night, and several other things on a daily basis. I’m sure you do, too. What if we poured some of that thoughtfulness into our relationship? Cook your hubby a special meal he loves, pick up one of his favorite treats on a trip to the store, or just turn on a basketball game for him!
When someone pays close attention to what brings us joy, and tries their best to make those things happen for us, we feel loved. Small acts of kindness help us feel noticed, appreciated, and understood. Do something thoughtful for your partner, and I’m sure they’ll return the love!
Kiss More Often
Kiss him all the time – plain and simple! Extra kisses in your daily routine will help you reconnect. So, you can avoid feeling like estranged roommates, and much more like lovers.
Ignite Some Sparks
Remember earlier when I said, I couldn’t remember how long it had been since I desired my partner? Well, realizing that stinks. We all go through periods where our sexual tension fizzles out or our bedroom routines grow stale. Maybe even nonexistent? But it doesn’t have to be that way!
Flirt with him! Give his butt a little squeeze while he is doing the dishes. Send him some unexpected pics of yourself wearing more (or less) than the usual t-shirt and ponytail. Download a playful app like KINDU. For more ideas, I loved this post! Whatever you decide, do something that makes you both feel sexy! Then just be sure to keep rekindling that fire!
Make Dates a Priority
I want to love my S.O. better, in the way he wants me to. Therefore, I asked him. He wants more date nights out of the house. Truthfully, this is a tricky one for us. We don’t have any family close by, so that leaves us asking friends or hiring someone. Asking the same people to watch our girl, over and over, doesn’t feel right to us. Hiring babysitters gets expensive. Furthermore, going out together, takes time, together. We don’t have a lot of that. Basically, if you’re rolling your eyes at this one, I feel you! Dating with kids seems impossible.
My best advice here is to get creative and plan ahead! Save up money throughout the month, so you can afford a date the last week of every month. Skim local Groupon deals for affordable food or event tickets. Pick your favorite date night spots and follow their Social Media pages to get updates on their specials! If you have a gym with a Kids Club, consider hitting the gym together. Some local businesses also offer Parent’s Nights Out for a pretty small fee, which could be a nice alternative to a date night sitter.
If you absolutely can’t have a night on the town, schedule a date in. Keep it special by dressing up and picking up wine or a fancy dessert. Need more inspiration? I love these date ideas!
Now, I’m curious. If you’re looking to revive your love this year, how do you plan to do it? Do you have any tried and true tricks up your sleeve for keeping romance alive?
Please share with us!
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We have a group of friends that we help babysit for. They watch our kids so we can have a date night and we watch theirs for the same. We used to go out as a group and while that’s nice once in awhile, we have realized it’s more important to connect as a couple!