fbpx

Selfishness Leads to Misery

“The more you make this world about you, the more miserable you will be.”

This is a quote by a well-known pastor named Matt Chandler. I’m not going to get into the spiritual side of his message, but rather just dig into this quote. I’ve been pondering it since I heard it and I believe it makes a lot of sense.

I feel like upon first looking at this quote, you may disagree. As moms, we’re always tired and feel like we are always taking care of others. Surely we’re not selfish. We need MORE self-care, not less.

So let me clarify. Let’s not confuse self-care with self-absorption or selfishness.

I’ve mentioned in a past blog the common motto that you have to secure your own oxygen mask before helping others. This is self-care. It’s making sure that we are keeping ourselves healthy: physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually, in order to better take care of our families.

Selfishness or self-absorption is much different than self-care. And as much as I want to believe I’m selfless as a mom, I know that I have a fair amount of selfishness in me.

It’s true–I want things to go my way. I want my husband to agree with me and go along with my plans. I want my kids to do what I say. The fact is we tend to think about how the world affects our lives more often than we maybe realize.

Now, how does that make us more miserable? Our expectations are usually impossible to meet.

I don’t know about you, but my husband thinks differently than I do and is often on a completely different wavelength than me. If I expect him to do everything that makes ME happy, I’m going to be sorely disappointed. He certainly tries, but he is not a perfect person. Plus he can be selfish just like I can. And my kids? I’m dreaming if I think they’re going to do everything I say. If everyone in the family wants everything to be about them, nobody is getting their way.

If I make everything about me, I am going to be severely let down.

What can we do instead?

Encourage your family (and especially yourself) to put others first. Imagine if every person in your house was working to love and serve everyone else in the house. How much more love and joy would there be in that?

Selfishness Leads to Misery

Start with your family and then work out into your school, workplace, church, community, and so on. I’m always finding that putting others above myself ends up being just as much a blessing to me as it is to the person I’m showing favor to.

I like the beginning quote, but I’d like to end with the opposite, positive spin:

The more you make this world about others, the more joy you will have.

 Make sure you never miss out on a parenting or community-related blog post: sign up to receive Cedar Rapids Moms posts in your inbox.  While you’re at it, join our VIP List to ensure you’re one of the first to know about upcoming Cedar Rapids Moms’ events and promotions!!


 

Summer Bucket List | In & Around Cedar Rapids

0
Embark on an unforgettable summer adventure in Cedar Rapids! From vibrant festivals to serene nature trails, Cedar Rapids offers a plethora of activities that promise to make this season one to remember. Join us...

2024 Summer Reading Programs | In & Around Cedar Rapids

1
Discover the joy of summer reading in and around Cedar Rapids! Dive into a world of adventure, imagination, and learning with Summer Reading Programs. From captivating stories to exciting activities, there's something for everyone....

Splash Pads | In & Around Cedar Rapids

0
Discover the joy of outdoor water fun for all ages with splash pads in and around the Cedar Rapids area! From vibrant water features to interactive play areas, these refreshing spots offer a perfect...

Summer Movies | In & Around Cedar Rapids

0
Welcome to a summer filled with fun for kids and families in and around Cedar Rapids! Get ready for exciting indoor and outdoor movie screenings, perfect for enjoying the warm weather and creating lasting...

Ultimate Guide to Ice Cream | In & Around Cedar Rapids

1
It's officially ice cream season! Nothing hits the spot more than twist cone on a hot, summer day. When it's hot and you're in a pinch for something to cool down, ice cream is...
 
Join our community.
Be the first to know about new resources, can't-miss happenings, and new blog articles! 
Yay, we're so glad you're here! Keep an eye on your inbox