The baby stage: It’s not for everyone

Many moms love the newborn stage of parenting; those squishy, precious new babies bring them so much joy.

Not me, I’d skip it if I could.

Don’t get me wrong being a mom is amazing, I love my three littles more than anything and truly try to enjoy my moments with them even through the screaming, fighting, and sassiness. However, each time my kids were brand new little nuggets and I was in a sleep-deprived state of crazy, I would always get the same advice from relatives or even the random lady at the grocery store: to enjoy every moment it goes by so fast, or being told that I will miss these days when they are gone so soak it in. 

Each time I heard these words I would cringe and feel an intense amount of rage at these statements. Was something wrong with me I would think to myself- why do I not like this stage? Do other moms really enjoy this? Even though I wanted to explain to these people that I, in fact, hate this part of motherhood and cannot wait until this squishy thing is older-  I would smile and move on with my day and try to bury deep the feelings I had toward being a mom during these times. 

Newborn stage

I was not the mom who soaked in the baby snuggles or loved the days of being stuck on the couch or trapped with the baby sleeping in the front pack.

We longed for the days when my little one would play independently and could tell me what they needed, or at least point and grunt. I would dream of the next stage where bedtime was a constant and I could have my evenings back to spend time with my husband. Day in and day out I told myself that once we were on one nap we could attend playdates again and I would not feel so glued to the clock.

I worried that I was not doing enough for my older two, who so desperately wanted to be out and on the go. The guilt of this was felt the most after having my last child as I knew I would never experience this age again and should try to soak it in as those “wise” people advised. It can be a daunting phase of parenting to feel lost and stuck in the day-to-day feeling like you are not as happy as you supposedly should be.

Now that I am finally out of the baby stage and have three kids 1, 4, and 7 my world is much brighter.

I love creating activities for my kids and taking them places to enjoy. Now that I do not have a baby eating around the clock, or needing to be held all of the time I feel a sense of freedom and excitement about parenting. As I look back on the times I was feeling low and guilty for not cherishing the spit-up or enjoying the late-night feedings. I realize that it was okay that I didn’t enjoy it because I love it now and babies just aren’t my cup of tea. 

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